Behind Blue Eyes
by Song of the Sirens
Summary: This fic isn't about Seto, surprisingly. It's about Kisara, her last few days on Earth, before being sacrificed and why she let herself be sacrificed without even so much as a fight and goes a few days into her life as the Priest Seto's dragon. Ch3 up.
1. Attacked! Demon of Destruction

Yu-Gi-Oh does not belong to me; they are the creations of Kazuki Takahashi.

Summary: Have an insight into Kisara's last few days on earth and all the things she thought but never said. She's not the perfect girl everyone makes her out to be, there's a reason for her sacrifice.

Told in Kisara's POV.

"…" someone else is talking

'…' Kisara is talking, otherwise she's just thinking. After all, it's in her perspective.

I italicized lines from the story that I will explain the reason for at the end of the story. If there's anything else you want me to italicize (doesn't have to be so I'll explain it, but that's ok too), please tell me so in a review and I'll edit the chapter and chapters to come. If there's anything inaccurate, please tell me so I'll rewrite that part.

Behind Blue Eyes

I am cold, tired, hurt, and dying. Cold in the blazing heat of Egypt, tired of walking through endless towns and cities, hurt from treading through miles of blistering sand and crawling through hellish sandstorms, and dying from thirst, starvation, and the wounds delivered to me.

Is it such a violation of people's security to be different? To have pale skin, light hair, and blue eyes? Or was it something other than my appearance? Villagers always said that I'd bring destruction upon them[1]. But what is that supposed to mean? I can't even defend myself, let alone hurting others.

But what can I do? The gods don't take pity on me, I've tried. There is no one willing to protect me; they all run away in fear. Do they see something I don't? Do they see a monster when they look at me?[2]

Finally, a city. Wait. How is that good? The people there will not act any differently than the people of the cities I went to before.  No one helps me, yet I've done nothing against them. Then again, I've also done nothing for them…[3]Was that the reason no one helped me? Because I've done nothing for them? Perhaps. Perhaps I should offer my services to a household or a shop keeper. Perhaps then they will help me.

But of what service could I be to anyone? At this current condition I am too weak to do any manual labor. My voice! Although my throat is parched, if they will feed me and give me water to drink, then I will gladly sing for them. Where to go now?

I feel like an unfaithful wife walking out of her home. People glare at me as I pass. They obviously see my apparent misery but no one offers a hand. Why? Are people afraid of me? Or afraid of themselves? If one person has pity for me, is it that they don't help me because they are afraid of the reaction of their villagers? Will they be mocked if they show compassion to me? [4]

They turn away from me in disgust as I walk past them.  I don't see reason not to. My head is hung down low with shame and disgrace. My appearance isn't a beautiful sight to behold. It is filthy, dirty, and disgusting. I am no one. I am it.[5]

It doesn't matter to them. I spot a drinking house, it isn't that noisy, perhaps they don't have an entertainer. I walk in and the moment I do, everyone turns around to stare at me.  Instantly their curious faces turn into a mask of scorn and repulsion. The tension in the air is so thick, I can hardly breathe. Or maybe that's from my weakening lungs.  They're probably shriveling up from lack of moisture.

"What do you want demon?"

Where did that voice come from? I'm about to die, I can't think right now.  Sleep…Food…Water…

'Ahh!'

Arms grabbed me from behind, shocking me out of my thoughts.  They are strong, much more than I am.

'No! Stop! What are you doing?! Let go of me! I only wanted water!'

I yell, but it is barely above a whisper.  They don't listen.  They're dragging me towards the town square.

'Anyone! Help me! I'll do anything!' I manage to shout to passersby. But they heed me not. My eyes land upon a shadowy figure lurking near the buildings, and I know he's looking at me too.  I'm pleading to him with my mind, my voice isn't working.

Help me sir, I'll do anything if you save me. A life saved is a life earned.

But he smirks at me. He thinks he'll never be in this same position. He thinks I'm weak.  For some reason, my anger flares. He seems astonished, but otherwise continues on his way. I'll make him regret that decision… [6] In one life, or the next.

I feel lightheaded, and it seems my body is glowing.  The villagers are truly afraid.

They berate my esteem with cruel words. "Go away! Leave our city in peace! We've done nothing to you, freak!" They pound against my body with sharp, jagged rocks. They care not where it is hurled. Gashes cut my worn down dress and beaten skin. I scream in pain, but no one listens. Visions of complete light explode in my head but I don't care.  I'm too weak to care at the moment.

"Water? You want water? Here!" an old woman dumps a bucket full of dirty dishwater onto me, shocking me out of my unconscious. Laughter commences. Mockery ensues. This world is a cold place for those different.

I beg them to stop again. 'Please! Stop!' but that's all I can sputter out. There are footsteps running towards me. I turn my head. I'd at least like to see who my tormentors are. A priest? Guards? Am I in that deep trouble? This is too much. I sink into nothingness—hold on; did someone just tell them to stop…?

End of Chapter 1.

* * *

[1] Or was it something other than my appearance? Villagers always said that I'd bring destruction upon them.

Here Kisara starts thinking the reason why people are afraid of her and call her a disaster is because of something outside of her appearance.

[2] Do they see a monster when they look at me?

She wonders what people see when they look at her that she doesn't see.

[3] Then again, I've also done nothing for them…

She's looking for an explanation of why people aren't helping her. She is trying to convince herself that there's nothing wrong with her.

[4] Or afraid of themselves? If one person has pity for me, is it that they don't help me because they are afraid of the reaction of their villagers? Will they be mocked if they show compassion to me?

She's trying to see it from their point of view, but partially accepting that she's different.

[5] It is filthy, dirty, and disgusting. I am no one. I am it.

Here, Kisara has fully accepted that she's different and considers herself nothing.

[6] I'll make him regret that decision

Even though she has a very low self esteem, she knew that man saw her pain and he laughed at her. He laughed at her position even though he was hiding in the shadows, so she got really angry.


	2. False Beliefs

Yu-Gi-Oh does not belong to me; they are the sole creations of Kazuki Takahashi.

Last time, we left off with Kisara unconscious after the villagers attack her, leaving certain priests and guards to save her.

Told in Kisara's POV.

"…" someone else is talking

'…' Kisara is talking, otherwise she's just thinking. After all, it's in her perspective.

I italicized lines from the story that I will explain the reason for at the end of the story. If there's anything else you want me to italicize (doesn't have to be so I'll explain it, but that's ok too), please tell me so in a review and I'll edit the chapter and chapters to come. If there's anything inaccurate, please tell me so I'll rewrite that part.

Italics = parts of story to be later explained in my notes; flashbacks; dreams

Bold = emphasis

Behind Blue Eyes

_-Dream-_

_The sun outside burned as scorching as ever, and despite being under a roof and having palm leaf fans, we were still hot. We consisted of me and this other girl with dark hair and brown eyes. She was dressed as I was, in a plain white skirt and no shoes. It was far too hot for both shoes and sandals. I tried wearing them once. They protected my feet from the blistering sand, but inside, they irritated my skin. _

_We were almost to a city, and the Temple of Bastet loomed above us in all its glory and magnificence. We could see the cat ears of the goddess, just barely through the high walls of the city. There were songs praising her, undoubtedly led by priests and priestesses._

_'I wonder what it's like to be a priestess.' I said, more thinking aloud than actually voicing a question. But she answered anyway._

_"It's great. You get to see the Pharaoh and you're very rich."_

_'And how would you know? Have you ever been or known a priestess?'_

_"Well no, but any normal person could see that it'd be great. I've heard stories of their houses, and it's almost as grand as the palace. Besides, what's not good about it? People kiss up to you wherever you go."_

_Her remark about normality stung me. She knew I was different, I knew I was different, but we decided a while ago that besides my appearance, I was normal. I wanted to yell at her, but she was one of the few friends I had. So I continued our conversation, ignoring the hurt I felt._

_'Kiss up?'_

_"Yea, kiss up. Priests and priestesses are rich, like I said, and people want to be in their favor. If you've earned their favor, chances are they'll try to get your farther in life or invite you over and help you out in times of trouble. But the sad thing is that they can be bribed too. Of course, that's good for whoever's bribing them."_

_'I lost you somewhere.' The girl sighed at Kisara's naivety: She still believed that priests were all good. _

_"Tomb robbers. Sometimes they pay priests to turn the other way as they're getting out of a tomb. And it works too. But sometimes the priests take it and look while the thief is still in there. And when they do that, the pharaohs usually accuse the priests of treason and kill both of them. But it's still good to be a priest."_

_That didn't make any sense to me. How could it be good if the Pharaoh ordered your execution?_

_'Why if the Pharaoh is out to get you?'_

_"Because everyone else isn't. Put it this way, Kisara: If **you** were a priestess, no one would dare make fun of you. So if you have the chance, you might want to kiss up to one so they feel sorry for you and protect you."_

_That was about all I could take. I don't really know what happened, but I pushed her out the window and onto the ground. I jumped out after her and she was still shocked, but I didn't care and started choking her. People—I don't know who, came over and pulled us apart. When we were questioned about what happened, she opened her mouth before I even thought of an answer._

_"Get that freak away from me."_

_-End Dream-_

I sat straight up in bed, shocking the person who'd been leaning over me. He was dressed in blue, a color of nobility, and he held the Sennen Rod, one of the Seven items that saved Egypt from invaders a decade and a half ago. He must be a Royal Priest. What was he doing? Did he save me? Am I in trouble? What is he doing? The way he stares at me…he knows more about my soul than I do…What does he want? [1]

What am I supposed to do while he's looking, studying me? Look back? Look away?

"Look at me."

Better do what he says…I brought my eyes to meet his. They were a deeper, much darker, shade than mine. My eyes were a bright sapphire, his were cerulean. And his face, which contrasted greatly from mine, his dark tanned skin, and my sickly pale, pallid [2]color. Is all of this to torment me? I want to turn away, but his eyes are so enchanting. Am I under a spell? Someone, I think my mother, once told me long ago, that sorcerers could control you if you met eye contact with them. To break the spell and gain back your free will, you had to close you eyes and look away. That's what I wanted to do. Look away.

I closed my eyes and started turning away_—_! I let out a breath and looked at him. He was not amused. His hand had shot out to grab my chin, keeping a tight firm hold on it. **Now **I was scared. **Now **I started praying against hope that they weren't going to kill me. If he was looking into my soul, he would hear all the things they said to me. All the insults people spat at me. All the people who ran away from me.

But he didn't say he was going to kill me. Instead, he looks at my arm, which is covered with dried blood, takes a washcloth and begins wiping it away. So I guess he must have been the priest who saved me. Sweet. I remembered my dream and how someone had told me to kiss up to priests because they were rich and powerful and influential. My chance in a lifetime. But I better confirm it before I dedicate myself to him.

'Did you save me?'

"Yes, you were hurt and being assaulted against false charges, so I brought you here. Here you will be tested."

So he **did **save me. False charges? Tested? I guess I'm going to go on a trial. But he said the charges weren't true, which meant he was on my side!

'I owe you my life.'[3]

He didn't say anything at first, just looked at me.

"Come with me."

He turned around and neared towards the door. I got off the bed and followed him. There were two sets of stairs: one which was more elegant and stable, the other one was narrow and winding. I thought we would go up; instead, he led me down, down the twisting steps.

Carefully, I followed him down, using the walls for support. I wondered where it led to; we'd been walking for awhile. He stopped. In front of him was a wall. I wondered if the exit had been blocked off. But instead, he used his Item to move the rocks. Amazing! I went through after him, but what I saw shocked me. There were levels of platforms held by chains, spikes at the bottom where I'm sure people fell into, and two people battling each other. Above them are huge monsters. I can't quite tell what that one is, but the other one is some sort of giant spider.

"Welcome Priest Set. Is that girl the one you say has tremendous power?"

I looked to my right. There are two other people besides the priest, the two battling, and myself. They both donned hooded linen robes. One of them was a short stout man, with a sadistic expression on his face. I don't like him. The other one was a much older man with the Sennen Eye in place of his left eye. Ouch. So I assume he's a priest as well.

But wait: tremendous power?

"Tell me, Gelbek, how do your experiments work? If she goes out there, how will her powers be unlocked? If she goes out there, will she even survive?" The Priest Set asked the shorter man who said I had tremendous power.

"Good question, Set. Gelbek told me that after several occasions, he noticed the prisoner's ka emerged or grew stronger to protect him when he was in danger. With this information, he concluded that all you need to do to draw out someone's ka, is to put their life in danger. Theoretically, one's ka will come out to protect them." The taller man said.

But the way they talk. Is this the test I'm supposed to take? I'll die if I go out there! And prisoners? So…he intended to kill me from the start? [4]  I'm struck with grief and despair, but if that's what he wants, that'll what I'll do. After all, I owe my life to him. They're arguing back and forth about my safety. What's the point? Finally, the older man convinces Priest Set to let me enter the arena. Priest Set looks put off and annoyed. I guess he doesn't think I'm worth his time or interrupting their experiments. Dejectedly, I walk onto the stage.

The prisoners notice me. They say something about attacking me instead. I close my eyes as their monsters charge towards me.[5]

* * *

[1] What was he doing? Did he save me? Am I in trouble? What is he doing? The way he stares at me…he knows more about my soul than I do…What does he want?

Kisara is one of those people who've been hurt and in trouble all their life, so naturally she would think something's wrong and act very paranoid.

[2] Sickly pale, pallid

I just can't imagine her describing herself in a self flattering way at this point. People have told her she's a freak because of her white skin.

[3] So…he intended to kill me from the start?

Remember what I said about paranoia? Yep, she's also rather pessimistic. According to her trail of thoughts, nothing good can happen to her without some catch.

[4] I guess he doesn't think I'm worth his time or interrupting their experiments.

She stopped listening to their conversation once she started thinking that he wanted her dead. I already mentioned that she's gotten a bit attack to him, and if she kept listening, she won't want to die or do whatever he wants. So bottom line is that she wasn't listening in on their conversation and thinking about the motive behind their words. Instead, she judged it all from his expression.

[5] I close my eyes as their monsters charge towards me.

First person who defended her sends her to her death. Would you really want to live then? Neither does Kisara.


	3. Unleash the Dragon

Yu-Gi-Oh does not belong to me; they are the sole creations of Kazuki Takahashi.

In the last chapter, Priest Set has brought Kisara to Priest Akunadin and Gelbek. Gelbek tells them that to bring out Kisara's ka, they have to 'test' her and by test, he means risk her life. Kisara makes an inaccurate assumption of Priest Set's feelings about practically sending her to her death, and walks out onto the platform ready to die.

Told in Kisara's POV.

"…" someone else is talking

'…' Kisara is talking, otherwise she's just thinking. After all, it's in her perspective.

I italicized lines from the story that I will explain the reason for at the end of the story. If there's anything else you want me to italicize (doesn't have to be so I'll explain it, but that's ok too), please tell me so in a review and I'll edit the chapter and chapters to come. If there's anything inaccurate, please tell me so I'll rewrite that part.

Italics =flashbacks; dreams

Bold = emphasis

Ok, I changed the notes thingy, and i made footnotes, so it's not italicized anymore.

* * *

And someone wrote to me in a review, asking me why Kisara was so naïve in the dream is she was so troubled. Sorry I didn't clarify this in the last chapter, but the reason is because the dream is a flashback. I know it's confusing, but I wasn't sure what to put it as since the thing happened while she was asleep.

Anyway, enough of what it was, let's get to her behavior. In the dream/flashback, Kisara was still a child, and held hope that there was someplace she belonged in the world. Her 'friend' knew she was different and despite constantly acting as her superior, but was one of the few people Kisara could sort of have a conversation with. Kisara's little outburst was due to her 'friend' just smashing what little faith and trust Kisara had in this girl, and all the anger she felt towards her was unleashed because of her 'friend' deciding Kisara was inferior.

The present ancient Egypt Kisara is far more pessimistic, true, but after years of having her hopes shattered, she couldn't have remained as happy and chipper as she was then. If she was, that'd be way too much like a Mary-Sue, to be happy and still have hope in the world if people have scorned you all your life and there was no one you could trust.

And now about why Kisara seems like she just wants to die, it's probably clear by now, but because of her not so chipper life, her debt to Priest Set, and her misunderstanding of his facial expression, she's forcing herself to go through with it because she thinks it'll repay her debt, and that way she can die with the knowledge that not the entire world hates her.

Everything is so dark. What happened? I'm awake, but I can't open my eyes. I'm aware of my surroundings, but I can't make a sound. The last thing I remember…

_-Flashback-_

_I'm flying. Flying. I look at myself, yet the sight that meets my eyes is foreign. White skin, as hard and cold as metal armor. Below me are the monsters about to attack what I thought was me. They're about to attack my human body! This is so bizarre. I've never been in this form before, but it feels so right, so true to be like this. Soaring above everyone, I feel so **powerful**, a feeling that's always been alien to me on land. _

_Gliding down, I grab my human body and Priest Set and shield them with my tail. This is who I'm meant to be, this is what I'm meant to do. Protect people. There is a faint sound coming to my right. Funny, my eyesight is so much better now, but I can hardly hear anymore. But I can see them talking. These people, Priest Akunadin and Gelbek, they were screaming. What for? I'm alright, Priest Set is alright, and I'm about to kill the man who attacked us. **Now** I see, their screams weren't of fear or concern even, it was of pure shock and amazement. _

_I don't waste any more time in assassinating the man. A short yelp of surprise quickly overcome by deafening screams of death, they all came as soon as I let out my fierce roar of a battle cry. Light, a burning bright dominant light fills the entire room, engulfing the prisoner, his ka, the planks of rotting wood, the rusting chains, the sharp spikes protruding from the pits and walls, the very air surrounding all these, entirely, destroying them quicker than a flash of lightning._

_The light accompanied by a bellowing thunder was more terrifying than anything I'd ever seen. True, this terror was made by me, but it seemed so unreal; far more surreal than me becoming a great beast that could fly. What was I? I have a tail, wings, claws, rows of sharp teeth, and white scales. Could I be a dragon? But did dragons not have black scales and red eyes? And I'm sure their bodies weren't quite as massive as mine, on the contrary, they're very bony._

_No time to think right now, I'm dissolving. Dissolving?! NO! I'm going into **that** body. I DESPISE that body. I am so weak in it. NO! I want to stay **here**! In this form! This form is far more superb; this extraordinarily powerful, magnificent, graceful, majestic form. Not my human body, it's weak, it's pathetic, and it's useless._

_-End Flashback-_

Crack! Thud! Thud! Bam!

Something hits me. Literally, something hits me. Is that…limestone? The ceiling! It's falling apart! More is falling…I don't like this position. I feel so vulnerable lying down. I need to get out, but how? What can I do? I'm locked in a cell and no one's coming to rescue me. Not Priest Set, not the Pharaoh, none of the guards, I'm all alone. Why? Why can't I be that dragon, that beautiful creature from my dreams? If I were, I could just take to the skies and fly. Fly far far away. Away from this pain, this agony, this torture.

There's no time for hopeless dreams. There's a chance. A tiny chance that if I live, I'll see Priest Set again. I want him to see me again, I want to thank him, he's given me more than I've ever hoped for. Ahh! My heart is burning. My lungs are beginning to suffocate. I need to leave.

"You! Please, come with me! The palace is collapsing, there's no time to sleep, follow me!"

It's him! No! What if this is my fault? Did I transform to the beast in my dreams? Am I really a demon? This is my fault; I need to tell him. Everything I know about me, I want him to know it too.

'My name is Kisara.'

"Fine! Kisara, we need to get out, NOW!" Priest Set says to me, while wrenching open the bars that keep me in here.

'What happened? Is the earth trembling? What---'

"Come!"

He grabs my hand, and for a while, I follow him. But I need to leave: leave this city, leave this nation, leave **him**. But I need to ask more than anything. He pauses when I begin speaking.

'Tell me one thing: Is this my fault? By any chance, was the demon inside me responsible for this disaster?'

He turns around to look at me. There is so much sorrow in those eyes, so much despair. Only a few days, a few hours, a few weeks, which is it? Only a while ago, they were so confident and assuring. I believed every word single word he spoke. They weren't many, but it was comforting.

"Kisara. No. You didn't cause this. It was caused by a demon, yes, but that demon is the demon called humans. Humans engulfed by bribes of power and control, humans who worship the evils of the world, humans so inhumane they are the worst demons of all."

His voice no longer assures me nor comforts me. It too is stricken with despair and sorrow. But the turmoil so much deeper than what his eyes let in. It is how I feel inside, how I felt before. No hope, lament, he is mourning the loss of something important: himself. He is lost, confused, dazed, everything I was. Was not am. Was not am. Was…**not** am…

I mourn for his loss with him. He helped me find myself, am I the demon that yanked his soul away from him? I can tell I affected him somehow. When I came, he was so unsure about everything. He argued about everything concerning me. The priest inside him said to sacrifice me for the better of Egypt. But the part of him not devoted to the gods and to the Pharaoh and to Egypt wanted to keep me safe. How much torment shows on my porcelain face? How much languish shows through my sapphire eyes?[1]

"Don't worry. You don't have a demon inside you." He says. Those words I will remember forever.[2]

"Leave quickly! Seek out a place that's not burning or collapsing! Go; run from the flames of war!" He's about to turn away, to find himself again; to sort out his problems and learn to move on. Something I never could do.

For the first time in so long, I say something with all of my heart; something that someone else needed to hear.[3]

'Thank you.'

It comes out strong and angelic. I mean it. I smile at him. He stares, and a tiny smile spreads across his face. Then he leaves, and I turn away as well.

"Kisara! Seek the light that cannot be captured by darkness!" His words are solemn, I want to turn back, but I can't. I can't look back. If I do, I'll never be able to leave him.

I've decided. I want to protect him. Him only. Not Pharaoh, not the people of Egypt, not the poor like me. I want to protect Priest Set. If I could, I'd stay in that demon form forever just to serve him, to serve my master.

I can still see the palace. No…What am I thinking? It's a calling; I need to save him like he saved me. I'm going back. Whether I leave or not, there won't be a place better than being with him: someone who accepts me.

I start running back. This isn't good. There's a huge figure where we just were. So intimidating, so foreboding, so threatening. Before I know it, I'm only a few steps away from Priest Set. Who is that? There's the Sennen Eye. That must be Priest Akunadin. And Priest Set. He's hurting. Akunadin…He's the demon that caused Priest Set to lose himself.

Okay, guys, the next chapter is probably the last chapter. Sorry it took so long to get this to you, I was occupied with Social Studies homework. But I like this chapter.

* * *

[1] How much torment shows on my porcelain face? How much languish shows through my sapphire eyes?[1]

I think, by now, Kisara would have gained some self-esteem. Her dream of being this beautiful dragon and the care Set gives her helps her. Porcelain, sapphire, they're much better terms to describe herself.

[2] Those words I will remember forever.

This was a translation from a site. The previous paragraph is Kisara feeling compassion and pity towards Set. I've always heard that eyes can reveal a lot about what you're thinking, and that Set looked at her and realized that she, this tormented girl, was feeling sorry for him, this rich and powerful high priest. And he says that there are no demons inside of her because that means she's a good person to care about others, or at least him, even when her own problems aren't all solved.

[3] For the first time in so long, I say something with all of my heart; something that someone else needed to hear.

As opposed to before, in chapters one and two, everything she said was something like I'm sorry or thank you, but those were obvious why she said it, like when Set saved her life, or she did something wrong. Here, although you may think it's obvious, it's not really. You may think she's saying thank you because Set just got her out of the collapsing palace, but her thank you this time was for helping her become stronger simply by caring for her.


End file.
